Category Archives: Best Of The Blog

Censorship and Holy Motors

My friend Cole ecstatically tweeted this morning that Holy Motors has just hit Netflix Streaming. About 10 seconds later, he posted far less ecstatically that the Netflix Streaming version of the film has been censored.

There are few times when Twitter has brought me from higher highs to lower lows in under 280 characters.

I love Holy Motors. Holy Motors is one of the greatest films that crossed my weary retinas in the last year. I’ve only seen it once so far, but I’ve been itching to show it to others. It’s funny, elegant, smart, baffling, arch, sincere, and unique. There are moments in that film that are destined to be iconic, the stuff of cinema legend.

So I was thrilled when I saw “Holy Motors” and “Netflix Streaming” in the same sentence. I was hoping to leap online and post, “GO WATCH THIS NOW, YOU HEATHENS!”

But sadly, I cannot fully recommend the cut seen on Netflix Streaming. Here’s why:

Holy Motors

That’s not what I saw in the theater. In the original version of the film, Denis Lavant sports a rather impressive erect penis in that shot.

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How to Survive a 24-Hour Movie Marathon

BNAT 2012

Fellow Minnesotans at Butt-Numb-a-Thon 14

Reader James C asks:

Hi Melissa, I have a question about BNAT but, not really about Butt Numb A Thon. Our local theatre here in Vancouver, BC is doing a 24 hour marathon soon and I thought maybe you could give me some tips on what you brought to get through the trip. Doubtless the seats at our theatre are not as great as the ALAMO and our theatre does not serve food (but I assume you would not just keep ordering food from them as it would be expensive) so what else can an 11-time BNAT professional guide a newbie through the 24 hours of sheer awesome? Thank you.

Hooray for the upcoming marathon at the Cinematheque! I am envious!

Yes, surviving a 24-hour marathon of movies is a unique experience that requires some special planning. Each particular event has its own personality and logistical needs depending on the organizers and the venue. (For example, the Alamo Drafthouse serves great food at the Butt-Numb-a-Thon, but you have to bring all your own food to B-Fest, which is housed in a university student union center.) However, most of the below survival tips will apply no matter what venue you are at.

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A Silent Movie Primer

From The White Shadow.

Last week, news channels announced that one of Alfred Hitchcock’s long-lost silent films, The White Shadow, had been found. Only about half of the full print exists, but it is nonetheless the earliest Hitchcock work that currently exists, and you can watch it right here on the web.

Alfred Hitchock is only one amazing director that his/her start in the silent era of filmmaking. The silent era is an amazing period of film, where the language of visual, in-motion storytelling was still being created out of nothing, and where all stories had to be told on the strength of their image. Directors who were forged in that era often went on to create sound films that birthed the golden age of filmmaking.

Some of these silent era experiments in film either did not work or do not age well; some silent filmmaking is difficult to endure even for an intrepid film nerd. However, there are a great many silent films that are fascinating, even 90 or 100 years later.

After a couple conversations I had last week about Hitchcock’s very early work, I realized that even some film fans I know aren’t very familiar with silent moviemaking. Thus, I figured it might be nice to assemble a Silent Film Primer: a list of silent films that could pique the interest of casual film fans.

Please keep in mind that the list below is not a “best of” list. It should not be judged by what it omits (“You forgot my favorite one!”). It is merely meant to be a list that highlights particularly nifty silent films that I believe would be fun for people who aren’t already familiar with very early filmmaking.

Let’s go! Continue Reading →

The Grand Unified Puppy Theory of Relationships

Wilma and Joey

Wilma and Joey have all this figured out.

Over the last few years, I’ve been mulling over the nature of human interpersonal relationships. I’ve started to see relationships between people — platonic, romantic, familial, professional, etc. — as an entity separate from the people who formed them. Oddly, I think this has become a very useful working model for understanding relationships. I call my model the Grand Unified Puppy Theory of Relationships.

It goes something like this: when you meet a person for the first time, the two of you are given a Relationship Puppy. What that Puppy does after that point depends on how the two of you treat your Puppy.

With me so far? Cool. Let’s proceed to bullet points! Continue Reading →

The Great Geek Cosplay Debate

This is me, in my completely non-canon gender-swapped Boba Fett costume. This is before I started drinking alcohol out of the helmet. DON’T JUDGE ME.

Every few months, a geek debate flares up on the social networks, about whether it’s proper in geek circles to cosplay (aka wear a costume) from a property that you do not personally know much about. Specifically, this debate often centers around “booth babes,” aka ladies who have been hired to work booths at the larger sci-fi and gaming conventions, many of whom are paid to look good in a costume but who do not know much about the product. The debate often spreads from there to cover young (mostly female) cosplayers, who love wandering around in fun costumes but don’t wholly subscribe to the overall geek culture.

Given that the target of these debates is a largely female population, there’s likely an element of sexism here. Also ageism. But I’m not going to get into that. I’m going to tell a story.

Once upon a time, back when I was dating a comic artist named Christopher Jones, I was very nearly a Booth Babe. Mr. Jones was, at the time, working on a comic based on the old UFO TV series, which you may remember as the 70s-tastic Gerry Anderson show with the ladies on the moon who wore silver go-go boots and purple wigs. We were planning to go to San Diego Comic Con to stir up interest (and hopefully money) for the future of this independent comics project.

At one point, I volunteered to dress up as one of the moon babes and hang out at the booth. I mean, why not? I never was a fan of the TV series, but the costume was fun. Besides, most of the people I knew at San Diego Comic Con at the time were going to be at that booth, and it would give me something to do. I’d be earning my keep, in a way.

In the end, the costume never got made, and the comic project folded completely before a year had passed. So I never did get to be a Booth Babe and have my knowledge of UFO challenged by the mega-geeks.

Still, if that had happened, would I have been a poseur? I can go toe-to-toe with the super-experts on many geeky non-UFO subjects. I also worked in the comics industry at the time, which put me ahead of at least 75% of the population of the San Diego Comic Con.

Whatever your answer is for that, let’s set it aside and consider this: I wouldn’t know a damn thing about UFO if it hadn’t been for that project.

My take on this whole debate, whether it involves ladybits or not, is that everyone has to start somewhere.

We were all young and clueless once. It’s likely we’re all young and clueless now, compared to our future selves. Just because the person dressed as a lumberjack in front of you can’t quote any Monty Python aside from that one song doesn’t mean they have any less passion than you. It probably just means they haven’t been exposed to the rest of the oeuvre yet. If you have real passion for the subject of the costume, why aren’t you reveling in the chance to show a newbie how cool that thing really is?

Even if that Booth Babe is being paid to be at the show, if she has a good enough time while she’s there, she’ll probably start getting interested in the nerdy stuff going on around her. Maybe she’ll buy her first comic. Maybe she’ll pick up a crazy-looking DVD at the Troma booth. Who knows?

Fresh blood is a key ingredient for long-term survival of most populations. Those naive kids are the ones that will proudly wield the sonic screwdrivers long after you’re gone, but only if you get them hooked on Dr. Who in the first place.